Rev. Warlock DRACONIS BLACKTHORNE (dblackthorne) wrote,

$t. Patrick's Day...

I don't care a whit for this so-called "$t. Patrick's Day" {as well as "$t. Valentine's Day", "$t. Nicholas", etc., and all of its goofball manifestations - what is it with all these 'saint' designated days anyway? At this point, society should be beyond that; as in the separation of church and state, even though these have largely become nothing more than money-making ventures for opportunistic companies with all the themed items, and whatnot, which is really the only reason they are even around anymore}. I'm not Irish, but even if I was, I would not care to give any sort of credence to some Saint from some other religious tradition, though what it has become is another excuse for the herd to copiously imbibe, surrounded in green coloration.* Leading the serpents out of Ireland is merely a euphemism for ridding the land of diabolical influences, as the serpent has always been ascribed to nefarious legendry, and I definitely feel an affinity for serpents - symbolically and aesthetically.

Folkorically, Leprechauns are mischievous, traditionally 'evil' creatures, as are most of these 'faerie folk' {gnomes, trolls, ogres, etc.}, who are definitely not the Tinkerbell and Lucky Charms variety, but cinematically, are perhaps more akin to the horror movie variation {Leprechaun 1, 2}. Because of the gold & money connotation, perhaps this is also where the term "seeing green", or "green with envy" stems, as the motivating force envy inspires one to attain similar items desired, or riches.

If there is some sort of metaphor, what would it amount to? Traditions that predate Christianity with names replaced with new ones, yet still basically representing the same notions.

The only apparent redeeming quality to this hallmark holyday would be in the practice of consuming a favorite meat, as in corned beef, which I partake in at any time of the year anyway, as it pleases Me to do so.

At least there was some sort of an interesting event regarding this particular day - that of an amusing 4.5 earthquake early in the morning, and all the petty 'panic' which ensued in the media. Just like with rain {'Storm Watch!' for a pithy few inches of much needed precipitation}, these exaggerated performances by the herd become temporarily entertaining, until soon becoming rather pathetic. ∞

* When I think of green, I think of Type O Negative, Frankenstein, The Creature From The Black Lagoon, The Incredible Hulk, Kermit the frog, reptiles, money {as in 'mean green'}, & absinthe.

St. Patrick's Day historical facts
  • 10. St. Patrick wasn't Irish. Historians believe he was born in what is now England, Scotland or Wales.
  • 9. St. Patrick's color is blue. WE'VE BEEN LIVING A LIE. You might want to hold off on the green face paint this year.
  • 8. St. Patrick's Day as we know it was invented in America. Really?! Catholic University's Irish American expert, Timothy Meagher, explains that St. Patrick's Day celebrations began in the 18th century in American cities with large Irish immigrant populations."It becomes a way to honor the saint but also to confirm ethnic identity and to create bonds of solidarity," Meagher explained. Really.
  • 7. March 17th is the day St. Patrick died. So you're celebrating his death, you a**hole.
  • 6. St. Patrick didn't drive all the snakes from Ireland. Probably because there's no evidence that snakes have EVER existed in Ireland. The climate is much too chilly for them.
  • 5. The shamrock isn't the symbol of Ireland. Sure, you can find shamrocks all over the Emerald Isle, but the real symbol is the harp.
  • 4 St. Patrick's Day used to be a dry holiday. Today's booze-bags look to the holiday as a great excuse to start drinking Guinness at 9 AM. Until 1970, however, all pubs in Ireland were closed in observance of the religious feast day.
  • 3. Corned beef and cabbage isn't a traditional Irish dish. It's just about as Irish as spaghetti and meatballs. You're better off sticking to Guinness.
  • 2. There are more Irish people living in the U.S. than Ireland. The population of Ireland is about 4.2. million. In contrast, there are around 34 MILLION people of Irish descent living in America.
  • 1. Your odds of finding a four-leaf clover are slim to none.
Tags: essay, holiday, holidays, seasonal, seasons in hell, social commentary, social observation, society, sociology

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