October 30th, 2004

Draconis Blackthorne, shadowgram, Dracomet

Nefarious Newsletter V.154

Table of Entrails

I. Quotations: Charlotte Bronte.
II. Nefarious News: What Better Place for Knockin' Boots?, Chainsaw Massacre: Australian Style, One Invitation You Don't Want, If This Car's A-Rockin'..., Is That Cocaine On Your Shirt?, There's No Place Like Someone Else's Home, Emergency Call Arouses Police Concern, Oily Grapplers Fear Gay Audience, Mom Packs More Than Lunch, Dead Husband Stays Home For Four Months, Family Pet Makes Tasty Snack, Is That A Hamster In Your Pocket, Best Man Vows For Groom, English Inventor Goes Down With Ship, L'amour...Toujours L'amour, Hide Your Women...or Your Garden Gnomes, Safe Canadian, Banana Peel Thrower Slips Away, The Proof Is In The Ordnance.
III. Interesting Facts & Foibles: Halloween trivia and other scary statistics, bizarre books, entertainment facts, High School Nicknames.
IV. Wicked Words: petrichor, nudnik, ananda.
V. Loki's Laugher: Classic Halloween Jokes.
VI. Hell's Bar & Grill: Beef Roll-Ups.
VII. The Devil's Web: Hollywood Hellhouse, Wax Museum at Fisherman's Wharf, The Devil's Rejects, The Beast,
VIII. The Shadow Gallery: Halloween Devil.

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Draconis Blackthorne, shadowgram, Dracomet

Hollywood Hellhouse!

Hollywood Hellhouse
Hollywood Hellhouse
4773 Hollywood Boulevard

Even before "Hellhouse of Hollywood", which was run by "un-daughter" Zeena Schrek, there was "Hellhouse", founded by Jerry Falwell, a christian minister to depict "real-life" situatons to horrify sheeple into the blindlight fane - it is basically a conversion device which rears its head every Halloween as an "alternative" to the harmless fun of Trick or Treating. Other churches copied the idea with variations including "Halleluia Night", and whatnot. Where instead of participating in the sublime charm of Halloween, children are instead kept sequestered with common games enacted like the rest of the year. If you ask children, they would much rather be frolicking in this night of revery and candy-acquisition, unless hopelessly brainwashed by their paranoid parents - so it really is a parental-problem issue overall. Personally, I would not recommend these Hellhouses for children, as some of them tend to be far too graphic, even if many of them tend to be a bit chintzy.

This past Halloween, Hollywood initiated its own hellhouse, taking directions from an actual booklet written by christian propagandists which reads rather like a Chick tract; but instead of serious attempts at conversion, this production was basically a mockery of the fundies and their stuporstition-mongering. Taking the urban legends of SRA, and alarmist tactics and inaccurate and exaggerrated situations such as a man dying of AIDS, a school shooting, a girl getting raped at a "rave" resulting in her suicide, a gorey abortion spectacle, Andy Richter {former Conan O' Brian co-host} as Jesus, etc., these actual actors {who sometimes had a hard time containing themselves} brought this to the fore with comedic fluorish, inclusive of Bill Maher playing The Devil, and demons accompanying the "sinners", egging them on towards erstwhile "damnation". One is lead through eight rooms, each depicting a scene mentioned, including a mock "sacrifice scene" committed by an erzatz "satanic cult" of devil-worshippers {of note, I did notice a Baphomet banner being used herein, but surprisingly, it was used with permission, as divulged from correspondence with HP Gilmore - why? For stratification. If this absurdity corrals the herd into the arms of the nazarene cult, then so much the better, for water will seek its own level}; On one wall near the end of the tour, is a painting of Jesus upon which one can tack 'confessions', finally concluding in a delightdully gruesome set of Hell, including the damned reaching out from within boiling cauldrons, and various tortures for help. The FX were better than usual, which was pleasing to the shadow side of the mind. The ultimate 'spirit' of this attraction was basically to poke three-pronged fun at evangelists, and it was quite amusing overall.

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